The Next Step..

I know I promised an entry on the stages we go through in a relationship et cetera etcetera, but when I started to type on it, I realized that is something we all know, have seen or have been through, like in every other movie or relationship. In other words, the idea was totally cliché. So as I've been targeting teen relating problems in my previous posts, I'd like to continue on it until I'm done or sick of writing about it. So I've taken up the issue of the next step in my life, the most essential one; at least for now. Well, not for everybody. I mean.... Let me just write and explain the rest. ;)

Let me warn you first that this article focuses the Pakistani youth. As I've been getting multiple hits internationally, I'd like to apologize to them because I'm not much aware of the culture in your respective countries, else I'd have loved to write on it in here as well. I hope I get the opportunity of exposure to the western world as well as the Far East of Asia so I can carry out this idea. But for now, I'd be more than glad if you bare my words and get to know what's up in our part of the world. You might even spare a little smile at a few places, *smile* because we have quite a few pieces here. Trust me; every single student here has their own story. Let me start with mine.

It was in the age of 6 when I first heard the name Oxford University in Kuch kuch Hota hai. I figured out that it was an amazing university which I had to attend simply because it was mentioned in a Shahrukh-Kajol movie. Anyhow, with the passage of time and my mother's response to the whole Oxford-Studying-Abroad plan, I got more and more convinced that I had to go there no matter what. I had no clue of which other universities exist, neither was I interested. All I knew of was Oxford until the day I got a postcard from my dad from the UK. I don’t remember the name of the exact university whose picture the postcard showed off, but I’m sure it was from one of the universities in the area of Preston, as that is where my dad was residing at that time. So when I got the chance of talking to him, he asked me about it and told me that I’ll be going there, etc. At that exact moment my mum repeated her words, tell him that you’re going to Oxford. I don’t know if she was serious or not, but from that time, I knew that I had major expectations upon my shoulders, but also I was of the view that Oxford would be the most expensive university in the world, silly me, so my dream might never come to life.

After a few years, my mother again came across a movie, Legally Blonde (yes, I have a very dramatic life! :P) That is when I came to know of Harvard, the actual best university of the world at that point in time. I didn’t know that at that time but I liked the feel of the place on the sets and the life, especially their hoodies! As I had never actually seen the campus of Oxford, I started leaning towards the American Best.

I know you might be thinking if I’m a wacko genius who got into each of the World’s top 10 universities but declined for I was in love with Pakistan. You’re heavily mistaken, my friend. *smiles* If everything had gone as planned and if I had left the country in last July, I might never have gotten the chance to spend time with my father and make an unbreakable bond. So from this I learnt that everything happens for the very best. I have no regrets from life. Everything that had made me weak at different points prepared me for life itself; I’m proud to say that it has led me to be a strong person.

I had many dreams at different stages of time. For your kind information, I never wanted to be a princess; I wanted to be a scientist simply because the test tubes intrigued me since the age of five. Yes, chemistry has been one of my favourite subjects of all time. Too bad I couldn’t continue with it. Then I wanted to be a doctor, after a few years, I started having doubts and thought that I want to be a lawyer. The doubts were assured after watching my Legally Blonde, and then my cousin proceed towards her final law degrees. After that my rebellious period started where all I wanted to do was go to a university in Pakistan, so I could stay near friends and where I could do my Arts, (at that time I had found out that I could sketch and I was too excited and boastful about it :P) so I decided on NCA, architecture. Honestly I saw no future of law here in Pakistan and I had no guidance. But once I came out of my egg shell, left my comfort zone, my school of 11-12 years behind, I came across a lot of people and teachers who guided me in learning the aspects of my interests and potentials. I am greatly thankful to them; they helped me to learn how to create your slot in a place.

I had given up on my self a long time ago. But soon I realized that it’s never too late. I made a promise to myself of making my place in OxBridge or Harvard/Yale. I still plan on enrolling into one of the above for Graduate School, and IA, I will make it in there. I have the will, hope and faith. Now all I require is the opportunity which I have to make and work hard for it.

“Continuous effort, not strength or intelligence, is the key to unlocking our potential.” - Winston Churchill

My point of sharing this is to make you realize that nothing is for the bad. If life gives you lemons, store them for a hot summer afternoon to make thirst quenching lemonade and enjoy. *grins* There’s ALWAYS a happy ending, all you have to do is believe in yours. :)

That was my view about my life and experience through my different stages. I've seen people with open opportunities of free education in the American continent and I've heard of the choices they make in life. I have a friend who gets extremely upset for that because when you're dying for such an opportunity and life's mocking you by giving you friends who waste theirs in the best possible way then all you want to do at that moment is shoot yourself to spare yourself the pain. So this is what I meant by saying that this might not be the most essential step in the life of every single person reading this. But at one fine day, such people do realize that they had their chance and they played tennis with it therefore the ball leaves their court.

Also, there are a lot of people, I have friends who personally think that they're good for nothing and as they are girls, they should be married off. Incorrect, it's all about interests. Physics does NOT interest me. I hate the currents, circuits, pressure and etc. So if you would put me in a Physics Major degree, I WOULD run off with the first person who proposes to me. Make the right choice and there is no chance that you do not feel like doing it. If you're not doing well, it doesn't mean that you should actually give up. I mean... Never give up. That's all you have to do. The latest trend in here is to do a BBA from the known University which has low entry standards. I'm pretty sure that more than half of the people who get in for the BBA do it to get a bachelor's degree. Stop and think that did you have any clue of what would you be taught in your classes before you spared a glance to your books? Most of the people didn't. All they know is that it'll end us in a 30K job in any firm or office in our country. Is that all you wanted from the 17 years you put in school? I mean.. What the hell. Then why wasting money on elite schools, you could've entered such universities from state-funded schools as well. Why waste the money? Your siblings might have outshone you if they would have had the chance. Maybe they stepped back to let you shine, and you might’ve let them down by going for the easy way out. Whenever you’re performing, perform your best, if you’re unprepared, make sure you perform. Sometimes it’s the spirit that counts. So before taking your step, make sure you’re not stepping over someone else’s dreams.

There’s a lot more to write regarding this issue, but some other time. So make sure you catch the final cut of this post.

Feedback, opinions, comments are heartily welcome. *smiles*

Be blessed.

Illusionary

I've practically grown up watching my uncle unconscious because of drug abuse. My father had been constantly living in different parts of the world to earn the bread and butter for our family. Therefore my mother chose on living with our family when we were young. So I've watched him in all of the states and my family suffering because of him. Watching him in funny states used to make me laugh at the start, but as I grew up I started feeling uncomfortable. His addiction keeps on going on and off. Even to date, it's sometimes hard to tell whether he's in his senses or just goofing around. I've seen him sneaking objects, selling them and using the money to fulfil his needs. Even to date, whenever I meet somebody not in his senses, I freak out.

When I joined a college for A levels, I tried befriending a couple of girls but after a couple of days when they started discussing intimate stuff with me, which involved drugs. I stood amongst them dumbfound. As soon as I went home, I discussed it with my closest friend of that time, because honestly I was scared. :P Yes. I'm not scared of insects, tiny reptiles, but drug abusers do get on my nerves. So what I got in reply from my friend was very simple, as he knew my plans of studying abroad after my A levels, that, well, that'll help you get used to of it so that you can live amongst such people comfortably when you go abroad. That was the exact time I felt that, CRAP! I'll never fit in amongst the crowd, neither in college, nor in the west. In other words, that was when I realised the significance of peer pressure. Because previously, I used to ask people that why the hell does peer pressure spoil you to the extent of abstaining from a healthy and blessed lifestyle? I realized that everything is not in the hands of the teenager, unless he has a strong will power, which is contributed by a supportive family. There are numerous draw backs of the current system of living separate from the extended family. A strong and united family makes a strong and happy human out of the little child running along in the house, creating menace. Lack of quality time with your children does not only distance you from them, but also they create emptiness in their personality. They lack the confidence level, required to compete in the race of the world. This makes them weak for a single moment, which can destroy their whole life ahead of them.

I've been raised by a wonderful set of parents but even I feel weak at times, but somehow I've been blessed by the sense of distinguishing between right and wrong. Maybe I get that genetically, because both my parents are full of morals and are from the few people who are ethically the strongest, I've came across in my almost 18 year old life. So there is no harm in feeling weak at times. I've done my parts on mistakes as well, not this destructive, but there always is pressure from the family of from the society.

Almost a year ago, before I left school, one of my friends from college took an overdose of sleeping pills to evade problems at home and came up in class. Once again, I felt weird and left the room. The only reason he did that was that things at his place were not fine. He had been having constant bickering and arguments with family. That guy was one of the dudes who used to be solving everybody else's problems all the time. So I see that nobody is perfect. All the help, all the right and wrong lectures, all the lessons fail to work when you're applying them to yourself. You can't solve your own problems like a doctor can't operate his own heart. We all need the support of family, friends or the society.

Even when people decide to start a new life, (I'm talking about the persistent addicts here) the society fails to accept them back. They don't really have a choice so the usually end up back to square one. However if the society had been of any help, if they could've given them a second chance, things might have been different. But if I can't look at the person who had freaked me out in intoxication, then who am I to complain, eh? Let's hope we all learn to give every wrong person a second or even a third try, before we end up facing fate and the consequences ourselves.

God, let peace be upon all of us.